The Time Traveler’s Morlock

I found this old high school prom photo of my girlfriend and I a few days ago. I’LL admit that yes, my hair wasn’t the nicest that day, but it was EFFING humid out alright!… And besides, she looks like a monster anyways, so LAY OFF MY HAIR! gaaawwwd…..

In contrast to high school memories and beautiful prom queens, the story of H.G Wells gal-e-vanting through time in search of his penis, I mean weenis,…err… Weena, is a gripping one. Not only does this dude manage to narrowly escape nuclear fallout, see his best friend’s son get old and bitter, and watch his house decay around him, but he lands in a world where people have evolved into a subterranean, glowey-eyed cult! LIKE JAWAS!!

Dude, GET BACK IN YOUR ELTON-JOHN MOBILE AND BOOK IT!!! THEYS GONNA EAT YO BRAINS!! Well, ok, maybe not, but who knows what goes on down there after the alarms go off!?? Maybe its a giant cave orgy like in the matrix?… I don’t know about you, but these hotties look ready to go.

If you haven’t already seen H.G Wells The Time Machine, DO IT! And for all you continuity freaks out there, you’ll have plenty to snark at. Like this pocket watch from 1905 that he uses in 1899!!!! Thats right, I’m ALL over that shit!